Identifying a Victim of Spousal Abuse
When people learn that someone they know and love was a victim of spousal abuse, the response of “I had no idea” is not uncommon. As hyper-aware of domestic violence as we may think we are in today’s society, the truth remains that people continue to go to great lengths to cover up their abuse.
Our stereotypes about abusive relationships mean that people who seem materially comfortable and externally happy avoid our notice – an idea that reinforces the victim’s desire to remain quiet instead of getting help. Further complicating matters, we tend to link the idea of abuse primarily to physical condition, even as the ideas of deeply traumatic psychological and emotional harassment slowly gain popular acceptance.
While it is not necessarily our place to make judgments on a victim for choosing to stay in an abusive situation, recognizing the signs of abuse can help us intervene if it is obviously in the person’s interest. Beyond the bruises, limping, and sores, here are a few tips that can be useful in identifying a victim of spousal abuse:
- Pay attention to how he or she acts around his or her partner. A healthy relationship is one that is free from any degree of fear on either part, so if you notice the victim suddenly falling quiet, cringing at physical contact, or any other noticeable change in behavior of this kind, there is a decent chance that all is not well.
- When the partner is not around, think about how the person in question speaks of his or her companion. Watch for any sort of justification for the spouse’s disposition or actions – for example, “He’s just very stressed at work, so it’s okay that he’s upset sometimes,” or “She wouldn’t normally talk to me that way.”
- Look for any signs of substance abuse and social withdrawal – if you’ve known the victim for a while, is he or she seeming to drink more than usual? Has he or she started to miss work or drop out of social functions?
Contact Us
If you deeply suspect that a person you care about is the victim of some form of spousal abuse but is reluctant to admit his or her situation, it is vital that you get in touch with the proper authorities. For more information on potential legal actions, contact the San Jose family lawyers of Daniel Jensen, P.C. today by calling 408-296-4100.
