Telling Kids about Divorce

San Jose Family Lawyer

When parents decide to file for divorce, one of the most difficult initial steps they face is breaking the news to their children. Finding the rights words to explain such a complicated situation is never easy, especially when the children are very young. It would be convenient if there was a universal script that parents could follow in these circumstances, but unfortunately every situation is different. There are, however, certain guidelines parents can follow to help the conversation go as smoothly as possible.

First, it is best to have the whole family present if this is possible. Having both parents there will make it easier to assure kids that they are still loved and supported by each of them. Additionally, if one child learns about what is going on before his or her siblings, this can create a stressful situation that may easily get out of hand.

Second, allow your children to set the pace of the conversation. They may have many questions right away, or they may need time to digest the news. Try to avoid overwhelming your kids with details before they can get a handle on what they are hearing. The first information you share should be the most relevant: who will be living where, how their daily routine will change, and so on.

Third, decide ahead of time how you will explain the divorce. This may be the hardest part. Children will want very much to know why this is happening, but the details of your relationship may not be appropriate for them to hear. Striking a balance between honesty and discretion is not easy, but it is important to try your best.

Contact a San Jose Divorce Attorney

For more information about San Jose divorce and custody arrangements, contact San Jose divorce attorney Daniel Jensen at 408-296-4100.